1 oz faith, 1 oz disbelief, .5 oz class, .5 oz of crass, shaken. Add a splash of whipped cream vodka, gently stir with a dong, and garnish with Taco Bell hot sauce and you have a Dongtini*.

* actual Dongtini recipe is any drink that’s been stirred with a dong.


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The Host

Bookshelf bombshells Simone Turkington and Stephanie Drury met in a series of tubes while cyber-stalking a British rock band. The band broke up shortly thereafter. Draw your own conclusions. Have you ever dropped Mentos into a Diet Coke? Just saying.

Stephanie and Simone believe and disbelieve in God, respectively. They have an appalling fascination with dongs, fast food, the swimsuit area of pop culture, good books, religion and large big plentiful dongs. They are both married. Their husbands endure.


Dongtini’s Twitter

Simone’s Twitter

Stephy’s Twitter

Description On this episode: Simone attended a puppy baptism, the documentary Paul McCartney Is Really Dead is The Room of documentaries, medical misadventures, what happens when you eat only McNuggets for 17 years, and Stephy explains the concept of worship to a baffled Simone. (Simone: “I don’t understand worship. It makes God sound like a giant egomaniac.” Stephy: “I know, right?”) Oh, and call the DongMail! 1-323-301-DONG  

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Dongtini – Episode 31

The puppy baptism Simone attended
Trailer for the wonderfully horrible ‘Paul McCartney Really Is Dead’. Note the narrator is supposed to be George Harrison. Christ almighty.

This comes up if you google "eye rubbing is bad."

Closing song: Mini Mansions — “Heart of Glass”
Show Notes