1 oz faith, 1 oz disbelief, .5 oz class, .5 oz of crass, shaken. Add a splash of whipped cream vodka, gently stir with a dong, and garnish with Taco Bell hot sauce and you have a Dongtini*.

* actual Dongtini recipe is any drink that’s been stirred with a dong.


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The Host

Bookshelf bombshells Simone Turkington and Stephanie Drury met in a series of tubes while cyber-stalking a British rock band. The band broke up shortly thereafter. Draw your own conclusions. Have you ever dropped Mentos into a Diet Coke? Just saying.

Stephanie and Simone believe and disbelieve in God, respectively. They have an appalling fascination with dongs, fast food, the swimsuit area of pop culture, good books, religion and large big plentiful dongs. They are both married. Their husbands endure.


Dongtini’s Twitter

Simone’s Twitter

Stephy’s Twitter


On this episode: kitten progress, the Give Me Sex Jesus documentary, office air conditioning as a sexist conspiracy, we ask the dong doctor about Clairsonic, regional pronounciation of “yahoo,” dinosaur erotica is a genre, the glass harmonica, an extra ridiculous Dong In The News™, and Listener Michael is processing tragedy by seeking community. We love you, Michael and Piper.

Show Notes


The official dermatoligist of Dongtini, aka the Dong Doctor, said to use this Cure gel aka “facial in a bottle” if you’re going to use anything.

Fun with Bitmoji

Fun with Bitmoji

What we looked like when we recorded this. One of us was showing more respect.

What we looked like when we recorded this. One of us was showing more respect.

Listener Michael wrote this to process the death of his daughter. You can buy it here.

And above is an x-ray of a 19-inch penis owner.

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